Yes, how dare women complain about “petty things.” They should be appreciative of the fact that they were born into the oppressed sex class and shut up, am I right? What a wonderful friend you were.
dudes if you post stuff online in support of feminism but don’t call out your friends when they make shitty remarks about women or do anything to create safer spaces in real life than you’re not doing much more than looking for positive attention and patting yourselves on the back
You don’t get to have opinions on feminism if you consume porn
I don’t know who told you that porn can be feminist — probably some white liberal professor who writes for Bitch, supports SlutWalk, and brunches with Hugo Schwyzer — but you need to exorcise those demons and get your shit together before it’s too late
So we should just give men less socially valued female bodies (you know, prostituted women) so they don’t kill more women. And when they do kill those most vulnerable of women, which they will because they demand sex AND affection AND adoration, then what? What else can we offer men to placate them? Who else can we sacrifice to male violence?
The answer to male violence is not to give entitled monsters everything they want. Women are DONE negotiating with terrorists.
I wish I could sleep right now, I just want to sleep and forget for a moment what a horrible fucking place this world is for women.
These are the victims of the May 23, 2014 Isla Vista, CA killings. They’ll receive too little face time for their loss.
Exactly. If you go to my anti-porn tag, there are tons of resources for both how horribly porn influences its viewers and how horribly it treats its female performers. Yet there are tons of libfems and “male feminists” on this website who talk about empowerment because once upon a time, Sasha Grey said porn is cool. Of course, they omit the part when she left the industry because of abuse.
Oh man, this one is just too big for little old tumblr, but…
"scared" - I think you hit it right there - safety is the crux of the matter.
People think they need gender because it is SAFE. And it IS actually - in real terms - safer to be part of a gender-group.
Humans are gregarious, we are herd animals - safety in numbers - our survival relies on being part of a group.
I know this isn’t the answer you were probably looking for - but I am going to the heart of it here - people are scared to let go of gender because of survival instinct.
Gender divides people into firm, measurable and therefore ‘comfortable’ groups. A gender-group is the quickest and easiest group people can find comfort and safety within - a group to ‘identify’ with. You walk into a crowded room and you can’t always tell people’s religion, ethnicity, socio-economic bracket, political views, etc. straight away - but you CAN tell their gender! “Safe allies” - your mammalian brain recognizes other members of your gender-caste at lightening speed and - feeling safer - your body then moves toward them (to form a herd).
This is particularly important for women who know that members of the ‘other’ group i.e. men - ARE dangerous to their survival. Which is why most women don’t feel any great rush to reject feminine gender identifiers - lipstick, long-hair and skirts etc - without female/male gender identifiers how do women know which of the other humans might rape them (i.e. men)?!? and which are statistically significantly more likely to kill them (i.e. men)?!? And it is also why women do not trust “women with penises” - because they are male and still able to (and do) rape us. (Trans-women-activists harm their own cause and alienate non-radfems each and every time they threaten a radfem with violence and rape (i.e. all the damn time). Why would any woman hearing that - trust any M2F able and willing to threaten rape against another woman? duh But i digress…)
So, it is really, really scary to step outside the most potent of all the social requirements. i.e. Your gender. And if you do you will be punished. Why? Firstly because dividing people means you can create a hierarchy!!!!
A baby is born - first question? is it a boy or girl? Because then people will know how to treat it - and if it is friend or foe to them.
Gender is based on sex because sex is the most convenient and easiest way to divide people. Gender is the group you are assigned based on something you can’t change (your sex), it’s not like a football team or political group that you can decide to support or reject. Someone else decides our gender based on our sex. So gender is essentially - the go-to, easy group for the vast majority of people.
It is even a group within a group i.e. you can have gendered or sex groups within a race/ethnic group, within a religious group, and even within a family group. You can divide a group and force a hierarchy based on sex. Gender is the truest divide.
Without gender life is more challenging - and people would have to accept humanity without clear cut friends or foes - and hierarchy would be much harder to justify and enforce!
It is also worthy of note - consider the fact that when non-human animals step outside their accepted group the other animals will turn on them just as humans do, i.e. viciously. They reject and punish the individual. People, like trans-people and non-conforming people and radfems, experience this rejection in the most obvious way, but everyone experiences it to some degree from very early in their lives. because we are gregarious herd animals - it is scary to be rejected. And we are all socialized to know the consequences that will result from gender rejection.
Of course, the reason people ‘change’ groups - but mentally hold on to the idea of gender (like trans-people) - is because they still want to be part of a group. They reject one group they don’t feel they fit - but still want to be accepted as part of the ‘other’ group.
It is also the reason why trans-women feel upset and betrayed when radfems point out that they are confusing an gender-group with a sex-group and are not women but are in fact trans-women. Trans-women have already rejected their assigned group and so want quick and full acceptance into their adopted group (whether invited or not) because then they have a ‘group’ in which to belong. Whenever women say ‘no, this gender-group is not a real group you are mistaken’ - trans-women feel panic that they will be left without a group. So they blame and attack the easiest targets i.e. the women messengers - but their anger and feelings of betrayal - are only really fear showing itself.
It’s all fear - it all comes down to fear.
Saying gender is nonsense makes people scared - fear of being left without a group in turn makes people hostile and angry, because anger is a natural response to fear, which reinforces the idea of gender which causes stronger bonds within the groups which causes further fear ad hostility. It is a circular story.
It is a pity really, that so many people miss the bigger picture…
radfems and transpeople both reject gender - the only difference is that transpeople want to keep gender firmly in place and just swap groups, i.e. they want to maintain the status quo - whereas radfems want to abolish the fictional concept of gender because it is only a smoke-and-mirrors front for real sex-based hierarchical groups - and do not want to replace gender-groups with anything but overthrow the whole system.
- Going along with one’s assigned gender is an (understandable) act of cowardice - based on survival instinct. (most people do this)
- Rejecting one’s assigned gender is a high risk act of bravery. (trans-people, non-gender conforming people, and many radfems do this)
- Adopting a different gender is an (understandable) act of cowardice. (trans-people do this)
- NOT adopting a different gender is an act of sheer and awesome high-risk and admirable bravery. (shout out to all non-gender conforming people & radfems)
The fact that there are people who hate her should tell you something… go do some research on her. She was no saint. She just had good a PR team.